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Making that final decision (putting your pet to sleep)
Feelings of total helplessness and the state of denial when you must decide are overwhelming. I myself went through this horrifying experience not long ago with a beautiful stray dog we had only had for about one and a half weeks. He was either already suffering from the problem or hurt himself playing. He seemed very normal when he suddenly arrived at our home. After about 3 days he became irritable with the puppies and would growl at them when they jumped on him. About a week later we noticed he was limping and a bit stiff in the back end and yipped if we moved him. He was a huge dog that liked to stay under foot so we needed to push him aside alot.Then he became more stiff and one night went outside stumbled to the back yard and could not get up but pulled himself with his fronet feet. He would not come in the house. We covered him with blankets and gave him water and food , he licked our hands. My son and I took turns checking on him. The next morning he had moved further from the nouse but was even more weak. I called the vet and they said bring him in. I tried to pull him on a blanket to the truck but he bit at me because of the pain. I could not lift him . Mike tried and he bit him. I then called the vet back and they sent out a technician. they muxxled him and lifted him up and his back end hung limp. They told me the most humane thing to do would be put him down that he felt it was a very bad case.I went a little bonkers and told them I couldn't do it. Then the tech told me to talk it over with Mike. I was in total denial and was not thinking of Flurry I was thinking only of myself. He was in Pain and confused and knew he was dying. I was not about to accept that nothing could be done and then it finally hit me . Dogs go off by themselves when they are going to die, it is their instinct. That was what he was trying to do. I also realized i was being selfish. I had to make the decision and let the technician be on his way so I stayed with flurry and told him it was okay to go to sleep tht he was a very good boy and then when he went i lost it. It tore my heart out. The only thing that mattered then was that he had no more pain. I feel so badly for people who have to go through this. We need to give all the support we possibley cn and NEVER say "It was just a dog or cat" They were our family!!!!
Replies to This Discussion
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Permalink Reply by Ellen Miles on
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Colleen, Flurry's story brought tears to my eyes. I'm so sorry you had to go through that but am so happy Flurry had you in the end. Sounds like he came to you because he knew you'd help him and give him love and do what needed to be done. He had the love of you and your family which is just what he needed. Love to you and your family.
Of course, there is no such thing as 'it was just a dog or cat'. People that think that have something missing inside and I can only think they're hurting more for it.
We are going to have to kill, graphic but somehow this is so horrible that I can't even think in terms of euthanasia..... even tho it is the kindest thing given the circumstances, just the way I'm dealing with it. We have been working with a hoarder. So far, we've pulled 26 cats and kittens. There are another 8-10 cats left. go to our blog if you want to read the whole story - many posts about Henry's cats starting in November or December...... horrible. Anyway, the last 10 we pulled were a bit older and suffering from the effects of living in a crowded house with not enough food, etc. We have no place for 3 of them. They're like house ferals. The next group we pull, we are killing. They're the older cats, who've been under stressful situations the longest, very very shy - we've only been able to see them through the dirty basement one night when we put some food in a place where we could see when they eat. We could see the patches of hair missing, which is due to the stress. We don't know what else they have. In addition to being no place for them, any place we move them would be stressful for them. It still feels horrible. It's been gnawing at my gut since we took the job on. Believe me. We've done what we can to rehome just the ones we have.
One of the posts I wrote on the blog was about my appreciation for the difficulty people who work with hoarders face - killing cats because there's no place for them. I'll never work with another hoarder again because of it. It's about pushed me over the edge. Read the post about the clinic or the one before. The morning we were scheduled for surgeries, I had 10 cats with homes for 5. I'd just decided on the 3rd one I'd have killed when my phone rang. It was 8am, a woman I'd called previously, called back and said she thought she might be able to find a place for the 5 cats. JOY. Kallie, my assistant, and I cried and hugged. Now, we've got to go for the others - within the next week. Say a prayer for them and for us.
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Permalink Reply by Laura~Admin on -
I have been through that 3 times in my life...the hardest and most unselfish thing I could have done. First it was with my very first baby, Precious. She was diagnosed with cancer in her bladder on halloween 1998. I had her on meds for quite a while and she was doing really well. She was always a very very clean dog...I trained her to go on a potty pad (that is how I realized something was wrong in the first place..her urine was a orange color). Anyway...the day I had to make that decision..I had been out shopping and when I came home Precious was not at the door like she normally was...she was laying on the floor in a pool of her own urine and blood. At that very instint..I knew...I knew it was time and I just picked her up and could not stop crying. You have to understand, Precious and I were like bookends...we were always glued at the hip, i guess you could say. I never ever wanted to have to make that decision with her...I always hoped that she would just pass in her sleep. But here I was having to make that decision. So i called the vet first thing the next morning...which was Dec 22, 1999. When i took her in she was so peaceful...she came to life for a few minutes...then in the room with the vet, (who had been her doctor all of her life), and the vet tech..we petted her and talked to her. Me and Patty, (the vet tech) were crying and Doc was tearing up too, but trying hard not to. He gave her the shot...and she was gone. A part of me died that day and has never returned. At the same time, I knew that she was at peace, and was not suffering. I had people say to me, oh its just a dog, get another one. Believe me, I wanted to punch them all!! I have since learned to stay away from people like that, especially when I have lost one of my babies. Yes, it is a hard decision, but one that needs to be made if one of our babies is suffering. I will get into my other two babies, Nicky and Brandi girl another day. As much as we love them and want them with us forever, we need to put there needs first...
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Permalink Reply by Colleen Del Bane~Creator~ on -
Okay we are even you made me cry too. This makes me more than just sick. It is horrible when you cant do enough isn't it. Is this Hoarder paying for his sins?
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Permalink Reply by Laura~Admin on
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One more thing about Precious. Long after she was gone I had a talk with her doc. He told me "Laura, normally when they are diagnosed with the kind of cancer that Precious had, they only survive at the most 3 months. You and Precious had such a strong bond that your love for each other kept her alive for 14 months!! " That was amazing to me but at the same time, I understood it because we really did have a special bond. I will miss her forever!!
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Permalink Reply by Lisa James on -
Unfortunately, sometimes euthanasia becomes the ONLY choice for some pets, & at times it's the kindest thing you can do for them. I put down one of our old, sick cats last week. The old boy had advanced stomatitis, chronic renal failure, & a weird autoimmune disorder that was like a feline version of lupus. He wasted away over a 6 month time frame after his last renal crash 6-8 months ago. When they get "that look" in their eyes, you know it's time to let them go.
However, in the past 20 years of doing rescue, we have had to euthanize half a dozen or so litter box problem cats that absolutely refused to retrain to a litter box, even after months of trying different things, & believe me, I'm very creative when it comes to that. Some of them we even placed in single pet homes to see if it was a "sharing" issue, & after 6 months or so of being in those homes, & working with those owners, they just weren't behaving any better, we took them back & had them put down.
It's never an easy decision to make, & it always leaves me feeling guilty, even when I knew it was the right thing to do.
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Permalink Reply by Colleen Del Bane~Creator~ on
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I felt horribly guilty at first but I am kinda okay now. I think it has been about 2.5 months now. since then I have heard so many stories about other dogs with that same problem.
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Permalink Reply by Nancy Ball on -
No words can describe this emotional decision. We are still dealing with our decision yesterday. Every walk we take now with our youngest Shih Tzu Maggie Mae, we see Oscar running ahead of us. I see him strolling out of the bedroom, yawning and waiting for us to get ready to go for our walk. I see him everywhere. Waiting for his home cooked dinner, waiting for his little "sister" when she lagged behind on our walks. Then it's dealing with removing his food and water bowls, bed, handkerchief...it's still so fresh and the void is felt everywhere. I know our hurt will get easier as time goes on. We've been through this before in 2004 with our little Mickey (14 yr old Shih Tzu), but it's one of the most difficult things to deal with because these animals are our children. And only people who feel the emotional connection with their pets can understand. Just wanted to thank everyone for their heart warming messages. It has been a huge help to receive such support. Colleen, thank you for posting this topic, it's so important for people to be able to talk about it to help in the healing process.
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Permalink Reply by Colleen Del Bane~Creator~ on
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I posted this right after I heard your story I felt so bad for you. I hope you start to heal soon . I still tear up if I let myself go there , so after awhile try not to go there so much, it helps.
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Permalink Reply by maudie rpcarr on
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Permalink Reply by Paula on -
I have been through such a decision twice in my life and I must say it is so painful that i think I will never recover. I believe it is the most humane thing to do, but on the other hand we are playing God. But I don't regret it for a second. When Jasper was put to sleep he went peacefully on my lap, I believe he didn't feel a thing, his last memory would be my touch, my smell, my lap. It is very difficult for us to take such a step, but at least we can give them a death with dignity and keep them in our hearts. But it hurts!
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Permalink Reply by Colleen Del Bane~Creator~ on
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INTENSELY
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Permalink Reply by Carol Bradshaw on
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My heart goes out to you and everyone faced with this difficult decision. It is probably one hardest part of pet ownership, but as responsible owners, it's one we will face eventually. Over 40 years with pet dogs and cats, we have faced this situation too many times. But it's the loving thing to do, when it's time. And somehow, we sense that the time is near. We are friends with the Director of our Humane Society, and she once told me something that that I still carry in my heart. Her mentor told her this, and she shared it with me. "It's better and more loving to put your pet down a week early, than to let it suffer one day too long." This has helped me to never feel guilty about making this most difficult of decisions. It never gets easier, but our hearts will always accept a new pet and allow you to love it without forfeiting the love you carry for your past pets. The first time I had to go through the process, I thought I would never get over it, but a wonderfully sympathetic technician at our vet, asked me if she could say a prayer and read "The Rainbow Bridge" poem. Tearfully I nodded yes. She read a prayer by Albert Schweitzer, and then the poem, and I was truly comforted by it. Most of you have heard or read The Rain Bridge, but it's worth repeating. Here's a link: http://www.rainbowbridge.com/Poem.htm Take care, and rest easy, knowing your wonderful pet is peaceful and among furry friends, and waiting patiently, no matter how long, for you.
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